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  • Grace T Kim

Energy Healing Red Flags

Updated: Dec 21, 2021

Unsuspecting people can easily fall for phoney energy healers - people who may have the abilities to heal but lack the experience or the professionalism required. Just because someone may have intuitive abilities, it doesn't mean that they should be a healer or jump right into this vocation before healing oneself. Sadly, a lot of so-called healers do. Here are some signs to look out for when you are dealing with an amateur healer.

  1. Sexual Relations

  2. Possessiveness

  3. Guru-complex

  4. Triggered Emotions

  5. Judgments

  6. False promises

Sexual Relations

Any situation where a person of influence starts a romantic relationship with a client is sexual misconduct. This strict ethical code refers to all leaders in society who hold a position of power and influence like teachers, doctors, and therapists. Energy healers make no exceptions.

Energy healers must NEVER engage in a sexual or romantic relationship with their client even if the client no longer uses the services of an energy healer. It is even advised for energy healers to avoid giving sessions to their loved ones (family members or spouses), because the relationship is too close.

This is an issue that I find mostly with male practitioners who unethically convince female clients or students to start a sexual relationship with them under the false claims that they are 'soul mates' or 'sexual union will heal the client'. This is a blatant abuse of power whether or not the intentions of the healer were real.

If any one faces this kind of manipulation, you must stop the relationship immediately. Unfortunately there is no governing body that overlooks or certifies energy healers to protect the public from unethical practices. So discernment and skepticism is the best approach when choosing one.


Healers who discourage clients to have other healers or modalities are insecure. This is an underlying issue that a healer must resolve before helping others. A healer should encourage a client to make decisions based on their gut feeling.

A healer must not assume that he/she is the ONLY person who can help an individual. Perhaps a practitioner is needed for the whole journey or just a part of it or just for planting a thought. It's really up to us to support the needs of an individual, and this can be a fleeting experience or a long-lasting one.

If someone is trying to keep you to him/herself, by smear campaigning or sparking fear or guilt,... you may want to think twice about this healer, because this journey is about you and getting all the help that you can get.


Yikes! Healers who drank too much of their own cool-aid. The thing is... healing is done through us and not by us. Beware of a healer who tries to be some kind of cult leader or guru. If they say something like, "you must follow me in order to heal" or "being in my presence is the only way to raise your energy" - this is a red flag. Any one trying to make you into some kind of dependent for life is not empowering you.

It's fine to seek help from a healer, but the idea of being forever dependent on a healer is unhealthy. The ultimate goal is to be able to heal and/or be independently navigating life from the life lessons resolved by oneself and/or with the healer.

Triggered Emotions

Healers who fail to clean their own inner mess will fail to provide a safe space for healing because their own unresolved traumas can unexpectedly explode during a session. This is why it is so important for healers to complete their own inner healing before considering helping others. This means that all major trauma in their past must be resolved.

The moment a healer emotionally attacks you in a session, immediately end the session. This issue goes hand-in-hand with judgements, because it reveals that the required inner work of a healer hasn't been completed before they began a practice.


In addition to emotional eruptions, a healer must be able to hold a safe and non-judgmental space for clients to process thoughts, actions and life lessons that bear a lot of shame. The healer's job is to channel wisdom and heal the shame with unconditional compassion rather than amplifying the shame with one's judgment.

Clients go to healers for their channeling abilities, not for their personal views or advice. The messages coming from healers must be coming from a higher place and this means that the tone should be compassionate, wise and unconditionally loving.

False Promises

There is only one guarantee, which is death - whenever and however it happens. Any healer who promises a specific result may believe it is true, but this is a red flag because there are limits to what we can do.

Healers must know when to send clients to other professional therapists or doctors. Most importantly, they need to be upfront with clients about the realistic expectations of their services.

Beware of a healer who tries to discourage a client from receiving medical or psychological help, and/or tries to convince a client to discontinue medications. This is a big red flag. The right approach is to encourage a client to continue receiving their medical/psychological support and use energy healing as a compliment to one's healing.

Hopefully, you will never face this kind of malpractice. If you have other red flags to share about healers, please share them in the comments. I hope that these tips will help you to be judicious when choosing your energy healer.

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